Is it really okay to take your dog to daycare?
Now I know that might seem really weird because I'm always talking about how it's so important
to manage absences and for you daycare might be the number one way that you do that.
Well in this podcast episode today I do want to explore the topic of daycares.
I'm actually really passionate that they can be a fantastic resource for lots of people.
But you will hear lots of others say that daycare was bad for their dog, that it didn't
work out for them.
And that's why I think it's important that we have a bit of a dive into the pros and
cons of daycares, why I think they can be really good, how to make sure it is a great
experience for your dog and how to pick the daycare that's exactly right for your pup.
Hello and welcome to the Be Right Back Separation Anxiety Podcast.
Hi I'm Julie Naismith, dog trainer, author and full on separation anxiety geek.
I've helped thousands of dogs overcome separation anxiety with my books, my online programs,
my trainer certification and my separation anxiety training app.
And this podcast is all about sharing my tips and tricks to help you teach your dog how
to be happy at home alone too.
So managing absences, as you know, and working with a dog with separation anxiety, all of
a sudden you have to find a way not to leave your dog.
Why?
Because when we work with dogs with fear, we gradually expose them, we use a technique
called gradual exposure, where we expose them to the thing that they're scared of, but in
tiny amounts, amounts that are so small that they're not scary.
So for a dog with a fear of being left alone, the thing that we use in our training is alone
time, but tiny, tiny, tiny amounts.
And if you're going through separation anxiety training, you will know all too well that
you start with maybe seconds.
And so when you're not training, or when you're not doing these teeny tiny absences, I really
encourage you to find a way not to leave your dog.
And I know that's not easy.
And I remember that feeling when I first worked out that we had to somehow completely rejig
our schedule, get help, get support, do whatever we needed to do to stop leaving Percy.
It's just mind-blowingly difficult, and crazy, and overwhelming.
But when you do it, you do really start to notice the benefits.
First off, it's a lot less stressful.
It's a lot less stressful than worrying if your dog is going to be okay when you're out.
And if you've got neighbours who complain, and you live in an apartment, then getting
into trouble is just not an option, right?
So it has a benefit to us.
But it also has a benefit to our dogs, because they're no longer being left for longer than
they can cope with.
They don't have to deal with the stress, or the worry, or the panic of being alone.
But you don't always have endless choices.
I know we didn't.
And daycare is often the go-to for many of us.
And increasingly, I'm seeing comments from people, sometimes it's kind of click-baity
stuff saying that daycares are bad for dogs, because dogs go to daycare, and it's chaos,
and dogs need more structure, and et cetera, et cetera.
And I do think a lot of what's written about daycares is truly alarmist.
Because lots of dogs really love daycare, and lots of dogs really benefit from being
at daycare.
And if you're trying to suspend absences, and it's your number one choice, then I don't
want you to get freaked by the stuff you read online about dogs should not go to daycare,
because I don't think that's the case.
In all of that alarmist content that you might be reading or hearing about, I do think there's
a nugget of truth, though, because not every dog does love daycare.
And not every daycare is a brilliant operation.
And that means that if you've got a dog with separation anxiety, you might have a dog who
just doesn't thrive at daycare, or perhaps doesn't thrive in a certain type of environment
at daycare.
And that's really important, because it's not the case that daycares are bad, dogs should
have a different alternative when you're trying to manage absences.
It's much more about finding what works for your dogs, finding a daycare that meets a
certain number of criteria, and I'm going to talk about those in this episode, and then
making your decisions wisely.
In general, it kind of goes without saying, but daycares are often geared towards big,
bouncy, dog-social dogs.
And I think that's where a lot of the kind of alarmist information, what that alarmist
information is responding to, because most dogs don't fall into that category.
Daycares are often used by people with young, adolescent, high-energy dogs who need an outlet
all day long, not necessarily because they have separation anxiety, but because they
need stuff to do.
And so while that can often be the profile of many daycares, because just naturally,
people with those types of dogs are more likely to use daycare, it doesn't mean to say that
all other dogs have to be excluded, far from it, because at a well-run daycare, dogs of
all ages, personalities, and energy levels can absolutely benefit.
So let's have a look at what makes for a good daycare then.
Here are my seven pointers for how you can identify what makes for a good daycare.
Number one, they are force-free.
This might be more important than numbers two to seven combined.
You need to find a daycare that is 100% committed to not using harsh, aversive training methods
on your dog.
Now you might be thinking, hang on, hang on, wait, it's just a daycare, I'm not taking
my dog there for training.
Well, yes and no, because remember, a big part of a daycare is having staff who understand
and work with and relate to dogs in order to manage dogs, right, because there's a lot
of crowd control, there's a lot of managing groups of dogs and making sure that interactions
are positive and making sure that nobody gets into any trouble.
And so there's, even if it's not formal, formal training, that intervention, the stuff that
daycare do, that is a type of training because people will be intervening in a certain way,
they'll be using certain methods if, you know, there's a fight or if one dog is getting a
bit over the top.
And what you don't want is for daycare staff to be using scary methods, aversive methods
that aren't from the force-free playbook.
So you definitely want to be asking what their philosophy is on training, even though it's
a daycare centre, ask them what their philosophy is on training.
You want to hear them say force-free, you want to hear them say R+, and ask them, do
they ever use punishment, do they ever use punitive methods on the dogs in their care?
So ask them outright.
Okay, number two, a good daycare is only going to use crates for those dogs who are happy
in their crate, so dogs that have been crate conditioned and are comfortable and contented
in their crate.
Ideally, if you can find a daycare centre that doesn't crate dogs at all, even better.
But you definitely want to make sure that the daycare doesn't crate dogs who hate being
in their crates, and chances are if you've got a dog with separation anxiety, I bet your
dog is one of those dogs who doesn't love being in their crate, especially in a strange
environment.
They might be okay in their crate in the living room while you're watching TV, but will your
dog who's got separation anxiety be okay in a crate in a strange place?
Highly unlikely.
So check out their stance on using crates.
Number three, they have a mix of dogs, they have a mix of breeds, they have a mix of ages,
they have a mix of personality types and a mix of energy levels.
So in other words, they are able to cater for dogs coming from all different starting
points.
It's not just a place where the big, loud, rambunctious dogs get to go around and be
chaotic and interact with each other in a kind of really high energy, crazy kind of
way.
Because if you've got a small, low energy, quiet, reserved, older dog who's like so done
with playing with other dogs, and by the way, that is fine, like you know, I play very differently
now at my age than I did when I was five, and it's perfectly okay for older dogs to
say, you know, I don't want any of that.
You crazy two-year-olds over there, yeah, yeah, you can do all of that, I just like
to snuggle, I just like to chill during the day.
So you want to make sure that your daycare really understands different types of dogs,
that dogs who don't want to play aren't a problem, and your dog isn't having issues
because he doesn't want to play with young, bouncy dogs.
So they understand the mix of breeds, the mix of profiles and personalities, and they
are okay with that.
Number four, and if they have that mix, you want to know that they've got quieter spaces
for the older dogs, for the smaller dogs, for the lower energy dogs.
So is there somewhere that if your dog isn't one of the bonkers ones that just wants to
tussle and roll about all day long, is there somewhere for your dog to hang out and be
away from the melee?
Number five, a good daycare will be really happy to work with you to get your dog comfortable
in the daycare.
That will mean things like they will allow you to do short trips to start with, or short
stays, an hour maybe, rather than you having to commit to half a day or even a full day.
It means they'll be very accommodating when it comes to helping you hand over your dog.
Because some dogs hate it when you walk in, hand over the leash, and off you go.
Sometimes you have to do things slightly differently for a dog to be okay with suddenly being left
in this new-ish environment, even if they've had kind of meet and greets, or they've had
short stays there of an hour or less.
Getting that hand over right can really matter for some dogs, so will your daycare work with
you on that?
Number six, they will absolutely let you do a tour.
They will have no reasons, no issues, no concerns about you having a look around.
No, they may decide that there are times of the day where it's better for you to go back
there than other times, maybe they have a quiet time and they don't necessarily want
visitors coming in and out during nap time.
If they let you book, then great, but if they say to you, no, we don't do tours because...
Then I would be deeply suspicious of that.
I mean, I get it because comings and goings and different people, that can be exciting
for dogs and they don't necessarily want to get all the dogs all amped up all day long.
But a managed tour, well, that's fine and they should be very happy to let you do that.
And linked to that, so looking behind the scenes and seeing whether it's going to be
right for your dog, also ask them about the camera situation.
Lots of fantastic daycares will offer a live feed, so that means that you can go online,
you can have a look either at your particular dog or some of them get people to sign waivers
where you can live stream the whole interaction, everything that's going on at the daycare.
Number seven, and it probably goes without saying, but you want to find a daycare that
makes special accommodations for dogs with separation anxiety, so that they understand
that your dog is different.
And you know what, if I was running a daycare, I would absolutely love clients like us, like
people like me when Percy had separation anxiety, people like you right now who, when you've
got a dog with separation anxiety, why?
Because we are committed clients, I tell you, so if you're running a daycare and listening
to this, let me tell you, the lengths we will go to to find ways for our dogs not to be
alone, it's just no other dog parent compares to our commitment.
We spend a lot of money on care for our dogs and we'll often do it for a number of years.
Now don't freak out if you're listening to this thinking, wait a minute, I'm working
on my dog getting over separation anxiety, now Julie's saying I'm going to be using daycare
for years.
I mean in the sense that when you're working with a dog with separation anxiety, when you
get your dog to a certain amount of time that you can start to do things or that you
feel like is true recovery and it might be 2, 3 hours, 4 hours, there still might be
times where you need to leave your dog for a whole 10 hours say.
Maybe you've got to go to a hospital appointment and it's in a hospital that's not close to
you and you're going to be in all day or whatever, so in your life, in your dog's life, if you
have a dog with separation anxiety, there may still be times in the future where you
want to rely on daycare much more so than someone who's got a quote, normal dog, you
know I hate saying normal dog, but yeah, normal dog.
And so if you're a daycare owner, just remember we're really committed, so if you understand
our dogs, you have got a really good client for life.
So it's worth understanding the needs of separation anxiety, the needs of dogs who've got separation
anxiety, it's really worth it.
And so if you're shopping around for a daycare, asking what they understand about separation
anxiety, what they do for dogs with separation anxiety, absolutely the way to go.
So all well and good, those are my criteria, the things that I would absolutely look for
now if I was shopping for a daycare.
And if you keep those in mind when you're looking for a daycare, chances are you're
going to have a much more successful experience.
And how to make daycare work for your dog, well, definitely shop around, okay, so take
all those criteria that I've just gone through, and if you've got options, shop around.
Now I know that sometimes we're limited, either because we live in a small place and there
aren't many daycares, or maybe just the logistics, you might live in a city and not have a car,
but you need to be able to choose a daycare that will do pick up and drop off, so you're
going to be more limited.
But do as much shopping around as you can using those criteria that I just gave you.
And then ask for references, so as you're doing your research, ask the daycare for references
from other clients, but here's the important thing, from other clients who have a dog with
separation anxiety, because you want to hear their experience.
How did the daycare accommodate their dog's separation anxiety?
What you don't want are a handful of references from clients who have dogs that are completely
different to yours, full-on, pro-social, don't mind being left fine in a crate, yeah, no,
those aren't the references that are going to matter to you, so definitely ask, can I
speak to somebody else, another one of your clients who's got a dog with separation anxiety
please?
I mentioned in my criteria, what makes for a good daycare, see if they can let you look
at the camera feed.
Now if they've got a camera feed, fantastic, they might have some privacy issues where
if you're not a client, you can't look, but definitely check out whether they've got a
camera feed, and if you can view it before you sign up, then brilliant.
Make sure you take your dog for those shorter sessions that I mentioned, so don't just dive
in for a half day, definitely don't dive in for a full day, see if they'll allow you to
drop your dog off for an hour, and that way you can be in the neighbourhood, you can be
round the corner, if anything goes wrong and it's just not working out, you can come in,
you can pick your dog up, and you haven't left your dog for four hours to just kind
of get on with it.
Now, you might find that your dog does struggle more in that first hour than is truly indicative
of how they'll cope, and what do I mean by struggled?
You'll often hear daycare staff report that your dog whined, your dog seemed very reserved,
your dog didn't want to interact, so just take what they say, take their observations
and think about them.
What do they really mean?
If your dog was reserved, well, that might be okay, because not every dog wants to be
in the thick of it at daycare.
If your dog is howling for an hour, then I think we've got a bigger problem.
But the challenge is that for lots of dogs, they are not going to absolutely love that
first hour.
They just won't.
I don't mean do a sink or swim thing where you say, right, you're just going for an hour
and you're just going to get on with it.
I just want you to know that lots of dogs can have a little bit of a struggle with their
first trips to daycare, but they can get better.
They can get more used to it.
I'm going to talk about that a bit more in a couple of minutes, because there's another
thing that I want you to do to make daycare work, because it's kind of linked to that
first hour, that first session.
But another way to make daycare work is definitely ask for a report card.
Now, lots of daycares do that as standard.
Maybe it's every day, it's every week.
When you get that report card, just be aware that some of the things they might say might
not be a problem.
If, for example, they're saying your dog didn't want to play with the other dogs, I wouldn't
worry at all about that.
Actually, what that would make me do is say, yeah, okay, my nine-year-old Jack Russell
Cheek Ross, who's quite small and quite nappy and sleepy, because he's nine, and he likes
to play, but he also likes to just chill, well, yeah, he won't be interacting with the
big bouncy dogs.
So do you have a space for him?
Do you have lots of nice comfy beds in a quiet room where he can go?
So ask for the report card, and when you get the information, see if it makes you think,
oh, I need to ask them to do this, or is that really a concern, or is it just that my dog
is different to the other dogs that they're used to?
Now, you know I said that often that first hour or the first time you drop your dog off,
it might not be a complete success.
And things that you can do to help improve the chances of success on that first session
or on ongoing sessions are reflecting on, how do I drop my dog off?
Because some dogs hate it when we walk in, and the leash gets handed over, and then we
just go bye.
Some dogs really can't cope with that.
Some dogs do better with really simple changes, perhaps a daycare staff member coming to your
car as you're parked outside and taking your dog.
Sometimes them collecting your dog.
Sometimes them collecting your dog from your house.
So kind of play around with these things, because different dogs do differently well.
And you might just have a dog who's just going to hate that handover regardless.
So if you have a staff member who could really help to change that up a little bit, maybe
the staff member has an amazing treat, the most delicious food that your dog only ever
gets at that time, then that's a fantastic opportunity to get daycare staff involved
in making that handover go smoother.
And that's going to help that first hour or that first drop off, that first session, go
that bit better.
And don't be surprised if your dog just continues to not to want to go in.
Some dogs just won't.
They'd rather be with you.
They would.
They'd rather stay with you.
But it doesn't mean to say that they're having an horrific time at daycare.
If you get the report card, if you can watch the camera feed, it could just mean that they'd
rather be with you, but they're OK at daycare.
I talk a lot about least worst alternatives when it comes to helping our dogs be OK with
their alternative care, with you managing absences.
Yeah, most dogs would much rather be with us in their home, right?
For the most part, especially older dogs.
But if you have no alternative, then being in daycare is a way better option for your
panicky dog than being home alone, especially if this is a daycare where they aren't going
to leave your dog alone, where they understand that your dog will need human company and
human contact for a lot of the time, where they have special provisions and accommodations
for dogs with separation anxiety.
For example, they will allow dogs with separation anxiety to hang out in the office where people
are all the time, or they are adamant that your dog with separation anxiety will never
be crated.
So even if your dog isn't saying, woohoo, this is the best place ever, the chances are
if you've got a dog who panics when they're home alone and you've done all your due diligence
and followed all the pointers in this podcast to select the right daycare, the chances are
your dog is going to feel better in that environment than they are home alone.
So absolutely do not give up on the idea of daycare just because you've read a few alarmist
comments saying that daycares are bad for dogs.
They're not.
A really good daycare is a fabulous option for a dog with separation anxiety.
Go through the criteria, be a picky client, and you and your dog will both be better off
for finding the right place.
That's it from me for this episode.
I'll catch you on the next one.
Thank you so much for listening to this episode of the Be Right Back Separation Anxiety Podcast.
If you want to find out more about how I can help you further, head over to julienaysmith.com.
Meanwhile, if you enjoyed listening today, I would love it if you would head over to
wherever you listen to your podcasts and consider rating my show.
Thanks so much.
Good luck with that training and bye for now.