Episode 13: Fear or Frustration?

Fear or Frustration Checklist

When your dog barks, chews, or destroys when left alone, how can you tell if it’s separation anxiety or something else? Work through these 6 questions and answer yes or no to each.

Question 1

Is this a young, high-energy dog who could be bored?

See what impact extra exercise and enrichment has on the home-alone behaviors. Frustrated behaviors respond well to extra stimulation.

Yes No

Question 2

Have you been trying to work on their home-alone issues for some time?

Anxiety-based behaviors aren’t quickly resolved. If you’ve been working on this for a while and it’s not shifting, that’s a strong indicator of fear rather than frustration.

Yes No

Question 3

Does your dog bark, chew, destroy, or act up the whole time you’re out? Or do they stop well before your return?

Anxious dogs are more likely to keep going and going and going. Bored dogs will give up more easily.

Yes No

Question 4

Is your dog middle- to senior-aged and has only recently started with these problem home-alone behaviors?

When separation-related problems start later in life, something could have happened to your dog while home alone to cause them to be frightened about being left.

Yes No

Question 5

Has there recently been a major change in your dog’s life?

Have you moved house? Has anyone in the household moved out? Has there been a big change in routine? Any of this can make a dog anxious about being alone.

Yes No

Question 6

Is your dog sensitive to noises? Or have they recently started to be sensitive to noises?

If so, a new noise either in the home or outside could be causing them to get scared when left alone.

Yes No

Mostly yeses? It’s likely anxiety.

The more yeses you answered, the more likely it is that your dog’s behavior is driven by genuine fear, not frustration or boredom. If you answered yes to question 2 in particular — you’ve been working on this for a while and it’s not getting better — that’s a strong sign of true separation anxiety.

Mostly nos? It could be frustration.

If most of your answers were no, your dog may be more frustrated or bored than genuinely anxious. Extra exercise, enrichment, and mental stimulation could make a real difference.

The bottom line

The most important thing you can do to work out whether it’s fear or frustration is to set up a camera and watch your dog when they’re home alone. That footage will tell you more than any checklist.

Listen to the full episode for more on this topic:

Episode 13: How Can You Really Tell If It’s Fear or Frustration? →

Written by Julie Naismith

Dog separation anxiety specialist. 15 years of experience, 100,000+ guardians helped, author of four books, and creator of the Be Right Back program.

About Julie →

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